I'm working on a film at the moment that requires a lot of props- massive ones. I was at a huge rustic props nirvana haven today and together, our team managed to make off with about 5 tonnes worth of metal, tables, chairs, twisted farming equipment, rusty everything etc. If you know me, you'll know that I'm not built for manual labour. It was an incident today that sparks off today's post- I was walking out wearing huge gloves to protect my hands, carrying a full-length trestle table. A guy who was on my team walked right by me, said hi and proceeded to walk back out with me as I talked to him about other stuff to take- without lifting a finger to help with my load. The table was easily 2.5m long by the way, I know I'm sturdy compared to a lot of girls but even so.
I was just astonished- what happened to the days where, if a guy saw you holding a stack of books, he'd offer to help? I wish I could say that it was the guys' fault but I'd be wrong. In this modern, politically correct world, the most a guy can expect if he tried to help would be a death glare and a "Sexist pig!" thrown in his direction. Yes, this is still a girl writing this. Feminism has a lot to answer to, despite its awesome perks. You know what though? We do need a guy's help sometimes. Whether we need them to lend their strength (both physically and spiritually), if we need a silent shoulder to lean on, if we need them to be chivalrous, when we look for beer mates (just me? sorry), when we need to learn how to change a tire/check our oil/clean gutters/anything mechanical bigger than a computer. We've somehow managed to portray that we don't need help at all anymore and that saddens me because as men and women, we're meant to complement each other fully. We're not made to be redundant to each other at all and yet the modern woman is taught to think that way.
So how to tell a guy that you do need help in some way without him throwing it back in your face ("See woman, your sense of direction fails you. You're only a woman, don't be too hard on yourself) or holding it over your head ("HAHAHAHA, I knew you couldn't do it")?
1. Ask outrightly and add the please and thank you. Showing manners tells the guy that you're not joking around and that if he doesn't come over there quick smart and help you with that desk, you're going to drop it on your foot, have to be taken to hospital to have it sewn back on and every girl and guy out there will know that he was a useless twerp that caused your limp.As much as the woman is ordained to be the 'helper' doesn't mean the man doesn't need to help the woman along. There are plenty more ways I suppose but I'm very tired from lifting heavy things all day. Next time, I'm going to point it out and challenge his masculinity in not helping me.
2. Challenge him to rise to the occasion. There's nothing like pushing that "I AM a Man!" button embedded deep within every guy. Utilise that part of him that wants to prove himself! Whether its physically or more growing-wise, every man wants to be told that he's done it.
3. Bribe him. Stomach. Company. Beer. The secret to why women always go to the toilet in pairs.